I have been at school all day and as the person who ogrinally started this post I would just like to say that I love kids and I love my subject area. My lack of motivation stems from the fact that I am $41,000 in the hole with student loans, I have no CC debt. And as a starting teaching in the state of Colorado I will make only $30,000 which is not enough to buy a home. It isn't even enough to rent a small house and pay off your loans at the same time because living expenses are so high. I am unmotivated because I am worried that I will be unable to pay the rent on a place to live, while still maintaining a vehical and paying off my loans. I don't expect to get rich teaching and I don't expect to live an extravigent life style, I just want to be able to pay the bills and enjoy life a little. We are all scared that we will never be able to own our home or buy a new car, we are worried about the basics not luxary cars or big screen tvs.

I lack of motivation all stems from the fact what you as parents see is not what is really going on. The public face of a school and the reality are too very differnt things. Go ask a teacher what the conversation at lunch was today and I bet that it wasn't what you thought it would be. Today my lunch conversation concerned job interviews and who was looking for what position elsewhere and for what reason. I am serious. You should see the paper work I have to do each week.

Today I had to deal with the network being down which meant I had to change all my plans at the last minute. We are in the middle of the state assessment tests so I don't even have all my student at one time because a quarter of them are off taking the tests, and I still have another week of testing to go.

Ashley